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  “I’d love to stay and chat with you two sex fiends but I’ve gotta scram. See you at home Abby.” She gets up, and dumps her tray and waves, leaving me with Lucas. Somewhere during that, he begins rubbing my leg with his. I swiftly move my leg to the other side to end the flirting. He takes the hint and returns to his food.

  “You’re a really slow eater.” I observe. He looks up and smiles his sexy smile that melts every bone in my body. “Could you not look at me like that please?”

  “Why? Does it bother you?” I ignore him and look around for any sign of them.

  “And I’m not slow; I just like to enjoy my food. You on the other hand inhale everything you eat.”

  “I do not.” Embarrassment washes all over me. Yeah, I do look ridiculous while eating. I can’t help it, I inhale the food down.

  “It’s okay. I still love you.”

  “Shut up. Jerk.” I can’t hide my smile. Suddenly, the seat moves slightly with the added weight of another body.

  “Hey babe, I’ve been looking for you.” I hear Brady’s voice beside me. I suddenly can’t move. He places his arm around my shoulder and squeezes. I look at him and force a smile.

  “Hey, I’ve been here. What’s up?” I look at Lucas and see irritation in his eyes. I silently plead to him that he says nothing. He looks away. Brady kisses my cheek.

  “Have you seen Brooke? She’s acting weird. Is she okay?” I ask, trying to catch him in a lie. I’m a total hypocrite and I can’t help it. He shakes his head and rubs his neck.

  “No, not lately. She seems okay as far as I know. Did y’all have a fight? Did something happen when you spent the night on Saturday?” Wow, he’s really good at this.

  “Nope, nothing happened. Hmm.” We both stop talking and I move my eyes over to Lucas and see that he is staring right at me. We lock gazes, and clearly the intensity is visible to those around us to see, but neither of us can look away.

  “Oh hey Lucas, I didn’t see you there. I thought you’d be off with Sarah or something.” Lucas looks at him, clearly peeved that he interrupted our intimate moment to talk about my sister. “We’re not together anymore.” He replies through gritted teeth.

  “Oh well that’s a shame. I never understood why you were with her in the first place but hey it’s none of my business.”

  “You’re right, it’s not.” Lucas fires back.

  “Okay, we need to go Brady.” I get up and attempt to take him with me but he just sits there, eyeing Lucas like he’s the devil.

  “So what are you doing here?” Brady asks Lucas and my mouth drops open. Oh shit, this could be bad. I pull on his arm. “Brady, seriously let’s go.” He looks at me innocently.

  “I’m just having a conversation with Lucas here. What’s the problem?”

  “You’re interrogating him. Lucas is still my friend, so he’s allowed to sit with me.” I’m pissed off now. He wasn’t there for me when I found out about Sarah leaving or when my dad came back suddenly. No he wasn’t, instead he was more than likely in bed with my best friend. Okay, I cheated on him. I get it, I’m guilty as charged. But he’s not any better. No matter what though, Lucas is still my friend and I can hang out with him.

  “I was just wondering why he is eating lunch with my girlfriend.” “Maybe because you weren’t there for me the last few days, and he was.” I storm out of the cafeteria, angry.

  Chapter 18

  Still angry about lunch with Brady, I get home and go straight to my room. I stay in there most of the evening, reading in my bean bag chair. It calms me. I hear voices outside my door but I don’t get up to see who it is. Of course it doesn’t matter because Lucas pokes his head in.

  “Hey, can I come in?” I nod and he opens the door and walks in, closing the door behind him. I stand up and place my book on my desk.

  “I’m sorry about today. I tried to stay quiet.” I give him a puzzled look because he can’t possibly think I am mad at him. Brady is the one who was rude and disrespectful. I walk into his open arms and wrap my own arms around his waist. I breathe in his musty and soapy scent. “It’s not your fault. You have nothing to apologize for.” I mumble into his chest. He holds me tightly and rests his chin on my head.

  “I love you Abby.” I look up into his beautiful green eyes and see nothing but love and passion. I break away and sit on the bed in a huff.

  “Look I’m sorry he was such an asshole. I didn’t expect to see him since he’s been MIA lately.” He shakes his head and sits on the bed next to me staring straight ahead. “Honestly, it’s okay. I would have been the same way. I can see he’s jealous and it shows he cares. Maybe you should talk to him. Ask him where you two stand, maybe he’ll be up front about him and Brooke. If they are actually “together” so to speak. I don’t want to cause more problems for you. I know you’ve got enough on your plate right now.” I shake my head in disbelief.

  “No, no don’t start this. I want you. I don’t care where we stand. There’s no “us” with me and Brady anymore. It’s over. I’m done.” Tears start stinging my eyes. I’m frustrated and don’t know what to do. I know I need to end our relationship already so Lucas and I can get on with ours. I’m tired of sneaking around. He pulls me close and kisses the top of my head. “I love you Abby. I won’t leave you, I promise.” I close my eyes and hold on tight, letting all of my tears flow freely from the past week. It’s a relief when I have no more left to shed. I smile and kiss him on the cheek. “Thank you.” He smiles and kisses me briefly on the lips before he heads home.

  “I know something’s bothering you. Want to talk about it?” My mother asks after dinner. I help clear the table, washing the dishes and pack leftovers away.

  “Yes actually. I do.” We both stop what we are doing and sit down at the kitchen table.

  “Shoot.” I let out a breath before telling her everything.

  “Lucas and I slept together. We are sort of dating, each other. I lied when I said I was staying the night at Brooke’s house last weekend. I stayed with him instead. I know it’s immature and was irresponsible of me. I get it. I’m guilty. But mom, I love him. I never stopped loving him all those years ago. But there’s more. When we went to the party a few weeks ago, I left with Lucas. Brooke got really drunk and a classmate took her home and Brady was too drunk to drive, he crashed there, so Lucas took me, only we didn’t come home right away. We went to IHOP for breakfast. We’ve been sneaking around for awhile. I’m sorry I lied. But I’m breaking up with Brady and telling him and Brooke everything.”

  My mother is silent and I can’t help but wonder what she’s thinking. It almost frightens me, but I know I deserve whatever punishment she gives out, since I’ve lied to her all this time. I’m suddenly kicking my own ass. If anyone would understand, it’s my mother. I’ve always been able to talk to her about anything; certain she would never judge me. After all, if you can’t confide in your mother, then who can you confide in? Brooke was not an option, at the moment. Besides, my mother is pretty cool, and even though she gives me grief about some things I tell her, I can always count on her to be truthful and supportive.

  “Say something mom. Please.” I plead. She looks at me and sighs, taking my hand in hers, which soothes me, yet makes me feel worse.

  “Well, first of all, I’m very disappointed that you felt you couldn’t talk to me about all of this. You came to me after your dream and I was supportive. Honey, I know what it’s like to have to make these decisions but if you found yourself stuck in a situation you are in now, well, I’d hope you would have enough sense to come to me sooner. Looks like you need some words of encouragement. You have enough family and friends around you to go to. I didn’t have that when I was your age. My father was an alcoholic and he didn’t care about my problems. My mother had so much to deal with. I kept everything locked up and it nearly drove me insane. Please, even if you don’t want to talk to me about it, find someone else who will listen.” She gently caresses my cheek and smiles sadly.

  “I know
you’re dealing with a lot but you need to tell Brooke and Brady about this and it needs to be sooner, rather than later.” She lets out a chuckle and I laugh too not sure what we’re laughing about but it feels good. “Why exactly are we laughing mom?”

  “I knew you couldn’t resist the hottie with a nice body.” I stand up and walk over to the sink to finish the dishes, appalled at her comment. She laughs harder at me and I throw the dish rag at her. “I can not believe you just said that mom. Seriously.” She walks over and helps me dry the dishes, while I hand wash.

  “Oh honey come on, have a sense of humor. I just like to see you cringe. It’s my job to embarrass you.” I wrinkle my nose in disgust and she flicks it with her finger.

  “Well its working thanks.” We work in sync until the kitchen is spotless and I’m drenched in soapy water. I plop down in the chair again tired, ready to retire for the night.

  “So, have you?” She leaves it open for me to finish the thought that’s probably filling up her mind. Damn, this is the last place I wanted to go. But I don’t hold anything back.

  “Yes. But before you say anything, we used protection. And don’t play the twenty question game because I’m not in the mood for that. Sarah has already tried it. Just know, he was gentle and patient. And oh so good.” She raises her eye brow in question. “You told Sarah?” I laugh at the fact that she’s more concerned with me telling my sister than with me having sex. It’s kind of amusing. “Mom, you’re baffling sometimes. And yes, I told her. She asked me a million questions. But, I like to keep some things private.”

  “So why am I baffling?” She asks curiously. The truth is, I love how she’s so different from most mothers. She’s more like a friend whom I can confide in with everything and know without a doubt she would support me. I guess not having parents to open up to really made her a better person. I smile at her.

  “For starters, you’re more concerned about me telling Sarah about my sex life than the fact that I had sex. But hey I’m not complaining. I’m lucky to have a supportive and loving mother.”

  “Yea, I’m a lot more liberal than most that’s for sure. But promise me something. I want you to be careful. You’re still young and will make mistakes. But when it comes to sex, please use protection. Every time. You don’t want a baby this young. You need to live life and enjoy your youth first.” I frown at the thought of my mother going through such difficult times with no one to turn to for help. I nod and lay my head on her shoulder.

  “I promise mom. We’ll be careful. Thanks for being so cool about everything. I love you.” I kiss her cheek and get up, ready for a shower before bed.

  “By the way-“ My mother says, stopping me by the door. I turn around to face her wondering what she’s going to say.

  “I want you to invite Lucas over for dinner soon.” Wow, is she trying to kill me?

  “Why, so you can hit on him? He’s not into older women mom. Sorry to crush your disturbing dreams.” She laughs, shaking her head.

  “No, I just want to interrogate him and whatnot. I promise I won’t embarrass you too badly.” I groan inwardly and bang my head against the wall. “Do I have to?” I say in a whiny voice, which is annoying.

  “Yes, honey. It’s only common for the parents to want to be more social with the significant others. And it’s not like Lucas doesn’t already know me. I’m sure he’ll be thrilled to be accepted into our family.”

  She makes a point that I can’t argue. He’s always been well liked by my mother ever since we were kids. I may just have to warn him though that she has a tiny crush on him. I laugh to myself, thinking about his likely reaction he’d have. “Okay fine. But I mean it, hands off.” She grins and wiggles her eye brows. “Okay, well I’m off to take a shower sicko. Goodnight.” I walk into the bathroom ignoring her laughter, which follows me.

  The rest of the week flies by and I have still heard any word from Brooke. At this point, I’m getting a little pissed at her. She hasn’t had the decency to call or text. She’s avoided me in school all week and it’s pretty obvious she’s guilty. Brady has been a pain in my ass too. He acts like a slug that won’t get off me. It sucks. No matter what, they are still my friends and if they want to be together, I won’t stop them. And I still don’t want to lose them as friends either.

  Last night, Lucas came over and we watched movies in my living room. My mother had other plans, so we had the house to ourselves, which didn’t bother me the least. I didn’t have to worry about my mother making eyes at him. “So your mom likes me huh?” He asked as we were sitting together on the couch sharing a bowl of popcorn. I punched his shoulder and made a face at him. He laughed at me and said “What? I think it’s cute. I just hope she doesn’t take it too personal when I tell her I’m not into MILF’s. But she is pretty hot for a mom.” I threw popcorn at him.

  “Seriously Lucas, that’s my mother! I don’t think of her as a MILF. Well, maybe, she is hot. I actually hope to be that hot when I’m older. But still, it’s my mother.” I laugh at myself for saying something so absurd. My mother is beautiful. She’s tall with long legs and gorgeous hazel eyes. Her hair is usually in a bun but when it’s down, it reaches past her mid back in perfect waves.

  He smiles at me showing his perfectly straight white teeth. “Oh I am pretty positive you’ll be that hot. And by the way, your mom’s not old.” Yeah, she acts like a teenager sometimes. I forget she’s my mother. I’m not sure if that’s a good thing or a bad thing. At least she doesn’t dress like one though. Then, I think I’d have a problem. When we finished watching the movies we had picked out, we went to our favorite spot, just by the river and lay down on the hood of his car, gazing up at the stars. It was a perfect night.

  This morning I woke up feeling stiff. I must have slept wrong because my neck hurt when I moved to get up. At breakfast my mother asked me how my night went and I laughed. “Oh it was fun. Sorry you missed it. But Lucas is looking forward to having dinner here soon.” Now she laughs and says “Well, why doesn’t he come over tonight? I’ll fry some fish.”

  “No, I have plans, but maybe tomorrow?” I ask and she smiles, nodding.

  “What are your plans?” I actually didn’t have any set in stone but I have an idea of what I’m going to do. It’s a sneaky plan. “Oh the usual, just going to visit some friends I haven’t seen in awhile.” It’s not a lie, but I don’t tell her the whole truth either. She tilts her head as if she’s trying to figure out what I’m scheming. I hear my phone buzz on the kitchen table. I pick it up and read it.

  “Hey sexy.” My face heats up.

  “Hi stud.”

  “Are we meeting up tonight?”

  “Later. I have something to do first.”

  “Boo. Okay well text me then. Love you.” He’s such a baby sometimes.

  “Relax, I’ll see you later. Love you too.”

  “Let me guess, loverboy?” My mom pulls me out of my daze. I look up at her. “Ha. Ha. You’re correct.”

  “May I just say, I love that you’re so happy. I’ve never seen you this happy when you were with Brady.” I agree, I was happy but never really happy. I’m always on cloud nine with Lucas. He makes me feel like I’m worth something. He’s always believed in me. And the way he looks at me, like I’m beautiful just makes me feel appreciated and worth it.

  “Yeah, I loved Brady but I don’t think I was ever in love with him.”

  “Yeah, I see that. Have you told him about you and Lucas yet?” I shake my head and look down at my hands in my lap. “No. Not yet.” She gives me a “what are you waiting for” look. “I will, quit looking at me like that.” She gets up and goes into the living room. I go to my room and read for a little while.

  “Hey Abby, I was going to go to the mall. Wanna come?” I look up from my book and think about it for a minute. Then I put my book down on my desk and grab my keys. “I’m driving.”

  “Tell me, when do you plan on catching the cheaters in the act?” Sarah asks as we’re sifting through rac
ks of clothes at Charlotte Russe. I browse a few blouses, holding onto them so I can try them on in the fitting room. “Oh, today actually.” She raises her eye brow at me. “Stop it! You and mom drive me crazy with that. I swear I must be the only one who can’t do it.” She laughs at me.

  “Sorry, I forgot you weren’t blessed with the ability to master The Rock look.” I smile wide. I always had a crush on Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson. I watched every wrestling match he participated in. I was sad when he quit wrestling to be in movies, though I loved those too. I bought every movie he was in. Lucas makes fun of my obsession but I don’t care. He’s totally sexy.

  “Earth to Abby, come in Abby.” I hear Sarah’s voice invade my hot fantasy. I sneer at her. “Oh I’m sorry, was I intruding on your sexual Lucas fantasies?” She asks.

  “Actually I was fantasizing about The Rock but thanks for asking, and interrupting.” She laughs and nudges my shoulder.

  “Does Lucas know you have sexy thoughts of someone else?” I nod and laugh. “Yeah, he laughs at me for obsessing over him.”

  “He’s just jealous he doesn’t look that good.” I slap her at that comment.

  “Hey, Lucas is pretty damn sexy. Leave him alone. Okay, I have a few of these I want to try on. I’ll be right back.” I walk away and find a sale’s assistant.

  “Excuse me; can I get a fitting room please?” I ask a tall red head. She turns around and smile at me, then grabs the key off the counter and I follow her to the dressing room. “If you need anything, call me I will be happy to help.”

  “Thanks, I think I’m fine.” I walk into the room and close the door. I put my purse down and hang up the blouses on the hook and look at myself in the mirror. I notice that the bags under my eyes are mostly gone, showing I’ve gotten more sleep lately. I feel like I have, a little at least. I pull off my shirt and start trying on clothes, one by one.

  “Abby!” I hear Sarah yelling from outside the fitting room. “I’m in here bonehead.” She knocks on my door and I consider not saying anything, making her search for me since all of the doors are locked. But I decide against it and behave myself instead. Then I hear my phone buzz. I fish for my phone in my purse and pull it out to see who is texting me.