Back to You Page 21

  I put my phone away as Brooke and Brady join me again. Brooke gives me a disapproving look. “Abby, please tell me you did not just text Lucas.” I look away so she can’t see the truth in my face.

  “Leave her alone Brooke.” She glares at him.

  “I need some punch.” I walk over to the table and serve myself some red punch, then grab some snacks too.

  “You guys go dance. I’ll be fine.” Brooke looks like she’s going to say something but Brady pulls her on the dance floor. I sit down and sip on my punch, watching everyone else have fun. I can handle this. I can do it. Brooke and Brady dance in the crowd but she watches me every few seconds, frowning. I know I’m only bringing her down. Maybe I can’t handle this. I check my phone. Nothing. My heart sinks.

  “Wow, you look hot!” Chelsea creeps up on me. I look up at her and give her a sidelong glance. She looks gorgeous. She is wearing a short strapless sparkling, sequined gold dress that flairs out in a dramatic fashion. It looks like it was made for her.

  “You look beautiful.” She sits down next to me.

  “Thanks. What happened between you and Lucas?”

  “I don’t want to talk about it.” She raises her eyebrow at me. “Seriously.”

  “Okay. Well, our sisters are spending the night together. I hope they don’t cause too much mischief.” I laugh.

  “Yeah, good luck with that. Sarah thrives on mischief.” Brooke and Brady come over to sit with us. And we all talk for awhile.

  “You doing okay?” Brooke nudges me. Chelsea leaves as Brooke asks. “No, I need to do something.” I stand up. Brooke is next to me. “What are you going to do?”

  “I want to go and find Lucas. I want to talk to him. I don’t want to sit here anymore and mope. I want to get him back.” That’s when I made up my mind to do just that. I take a deep breath.

  “Good luck Abby.” Brady says pulling Brooke away from me. “Let her go.” She turns to him and nods feeling defeated.

  “Good luck. Call or text if you need me.” I hug her and escape the prom scene.

  Chapter 28

  My nerves are all over the place, as I make my over to Lucas’s. I feel sick, worried, overwhelmed, but most of all I’m angry. He didn’t show up for prom and he won’t return my texts, or calls. What Hell is wrong with him? Has he really given up on us, like that? All those years of friendship, gone? I thought being honest was encouraged in a relationship of all kinds. And just because I’m honest with my feelings, he doesn’t like it and wants to end it? Well screw that, I’m not giving him that chance and say it’s over. He’s always been a big part of my life and I won’t give up without a fight. A million thoughts consume my brain. What if he slams the door in my face when he sees me? What would I do, could I do? I grab my phone off the passenger seat to make a call. One. Two. Three.

  “Hello?”

  “Tell me I’m stupid for doing this. Tell me to turn around and come back.”

  “Oh, Abby, you’re not stupid at all. You love him and even if he’s being a giant ass right now, we all know he still loves you. Maybe you just need to be the bigger person and show him that you’re not giving up. Maybe he’s the one that needs saving this time.” At that last comment it dawns on me that Brooke has never been more right. After all the saving he’s done for me, it looks like he might need the saving tonight. After a minute of silence I say, “Brooke I love you.”

  “I love you too Abby. Now go get your prince.” I smile and hang up the phone. I knew calling Brooke would calm my nerves. She was always good about telling the truth, when I was doing something stupid, dangerous or in this case, when I was doing something right. I needed her reassurance at this moment. And for the first time I feel like it will be okay. I’m determined to prove my love and devotion to the boy I always hoped and dreamed I would come back to. Past aside, future ahead…my heart knows no bounds.

  Back to you Lucas, that’s where I’m gonna be.

  As soon as I pull up, I take one long deep breath and kill the engine. Quietly getting out and shutting the door, I saunter up the steps to his house. Before I can knock, the door swings open and Ashton flinches, surprised to see me. I look at the driveway and notice his truck sitting there. Must have missed it when I drove up. Of course I parked on the curb so I guess it makes sense I didn’t see it. He looks out at the road then looks back at me.

  “Are you lost?” Then he grins and closes the door behind him, heading to his truck.

  “No, actually I was looking for Lucas. Is he home?”

  “Wow, you do, I mean that dress is…well.” I raise my hand to shut him up. “Hot. I get it. I’ve been told one too many times tonight. But the one person I really want to hear it from didn’t show up for prom. So is he home?” He gets in and shuts his door, ignoring me.

  “Ashton please.” He finally looks at me then at the front door.

  “He’s here. No one else is home so you have the house to yourselves. But try not to kill each other if you fight, okay?” I resign and drop my head in a dramatic fashion, sighing loudly for the added effect.

  “Okay, we’ll try not to. At least I will. I can’t say the same for him.” He smiles and squeezes my left cheek.

  “Okay, you kids have fun, but stay protected.” I slap his arm away in mock fury. “Just go already.” I scoff, jokingly. He laughs, as he backs out of the driveway and onto the street. I wait until he’s completely out of sight and take one long look at the front of his house, and then back to the front door.

  I knock three times and wait. My stomach is in knots and my head feels like it’s about to explode. Finally, before I knock again, the door swings open. He’s standing there; very casually in black Nike shorts and a white t shirt. I suddenly feel a little overdressed. He gazes over my appearance, before he looks away. For a moment I think I see a flicker of a smile creep up on his face, but then it’s gone.

  “Hey.” My voice is strained, almost a whisper.

  “Hi.” He doesn’t look at me. Not the reaction I was hoping to get.

  “Can I come in?”

  “We have nothing to discuss anymore Abby.” He says right as he moves to shut the door in my face I put my hand up to stop it. “Yes we do, now let me in.” I almost growl and push past him. He closes the door and turns to me but looks away quickly. Am I that repulsive that he can’t look at me now?

  “Why aren’t you at prom?” He asks. I purse my lips together and hold my tongue for a moment.

  “You’re not there Lucas, that’s why.” He sits as far from me as he can manage. And it’s all I can do to not scream at him. Save your prince I remind myself. Be patient.

  “Oh, well I never go to those dances anyway so why start now?” He says nonchalantly. Who the Hell is this guy?

  “Brady had said you were going to ask me to go with you. And even after our fight, word had it you were still thinking of going.” He shrugs like its no big deal.

  “Well, I had changed my mind.”

  “Who are you?” He cocks his head to the side, looking at me like I was crazy.

  “What do you mean who am I?” He narrows his eyes.

  “You’ve changed. You’re very standoffish and short with me.”

  “Why did you come here Abby?” He asks, looking away from me again.

  “I came here to tell you, you were right.”

  “About?” He gives me a brief glance. I guess it’s better than no glance at all.

  “I’ve been selfish and wrapped up in my own bull shit to notice that you may have needed comforting too. After my father abandoned us and everything else, I was lost and you were there and you saved me, took me away from my troubles. But I just never stopped to think that you needed a friend too after the crap you went through.” He stands up and starts pacing the room, irritated of sorts.

  “Are you done?” I look at him, tears welling up in my eyes. Is he kicking me out?

  “I’m sorry Lucas. I’m sorry for hurting you. I’m sorry for doubting you, us.” I slowly turn towa
rd the door to walk away. “Most of all I’m sorry that I’ve made you hate me so much that you can’t even look at me right now. I never wanted you to be disgusted by me.” I walk to the door and in an instant; he’s standing in front of me blocking my path.

  “You think I’m disgusted by you?” His face is a mask of pain and hurt and longing. I see my old Lucas standing before me. His eyes water just the tiniest bit but I notice it.

  “You haven’t been able to look at me much since I’ve been here. What else am I supposed to think?”

  “Oh fuck it!” He walks toward me and grabs me by the shoulders; his hands are warm on my skin, sending electrical currents through my entire body. He stares right into my eyes and I’m lost.

  “I have made my best attempt not to look at you because when I do, all I want to do is rip this dress off of you and throw you on my bed, since the moment I opened the door and saw you.” I gasp in surprise. But in my head I’m screaming DO IT! DO IT! I’m rendered speechless. I quickly compose myself as he lets go of me, but remains in my personal space.

  “Well, that was unexpected.” I admit. The body heat he gives off is undeniable, but flaming hot. He still wants me as much as I want him. I smile to myself and gaze into his eyes. He looks away for a split second before meeting my eyes again.

  “I’m sorry for being a complete jackass. It’s been really-“ I put my first two fingers to his lips to stop him. “Shh, don’t talk. Not right now, please.” I say quietly.

  He watches me carefully. I grab his hand, bring it to my mouth and gently kiss his fingers, never taking my eyes off of him. He’s stunned. My heart hammers in my chest, and butterflies flutter in my stomach. I bring my hand up to his face and trace his hairline all the way down to his jaw line. He closes his eyes and a moan escapes his throat. I smile, and when he opens his eyes, he smiles back. My heart skips a beat. He wraps his arms around my waist and pulls me closer to him. Then our lips meet, at first softly, then with more passion, aggressively. He backs me up against the front door; his hands are all over my body, across my back, shoulders and down by my butt. I grab him and pull him as close to me as I can, even though he’s as close as he can get. He lifts me up and I wrap my legs around his waist. Luckily the dress has give, so I'm able to do this. We are still lost in our kiss as our tongues dance around each other gleefully. He stops kissing me for a moment and I’m left panting, breathless.

  “What’s wrong?” I ask, curious by his sudden need to stop. He sets me down and leans into me, running his fingers through his hair. “Lucas? Talk to me.” I search his face for some kind of clue.

  “I’m sorry. I never meant to hurt you. I’ve been so unhappy since I left you. And I know it was my fault. I overreacted and was a complete prick. I love you so much it hurts. When we were fighting and you brought up the abortion, it just scared me that it would never work out. You’d never be happy with me, and always reminded of the past.” He swiftly kisses my cheek, then my nose, and softly down my neck. He stops and our eyes lock. Intensely.

  “I can’t imagine never touching you, holding you or loving you. It killed me, so I thought not being near you would help. But it didn’t.” I placed both of my hands on each side of his face, making circular motions with my thumbs. “Lucas, it was my fault for not letting go of the past and letting it come between us. For throwing it in your face, when you had no control of it. I’m sorry I wasn’t there for you when you needed me.”

  He shakes his head, kissing my arms. “You were. You made me forget about my problems. Just being with you is more than enough for me. You saved me. The things that I went through weren’t half as bad as what you’ve been through. I didn’t want to burden you with more unnecessary bull shit.”

  I see a tear slowly roll down his cheek. I kiss it away as my own tears fall. It’s the most vulnerable I’ve ever seen him. He hastily wipes his eyes with the sleeve of his shirt. Once he is composed, he places his hands on either side of my head on the wall, his face merely inches from mine.

  “By the way, you look hot tonight.” He whispers in my ear. A shiver runs through me. I move my head just as he presses his lips to mine again. All of the air in my lungs has escaped. I remove his shirt in one swift motion and he throws it on the floor. My hands explore his muscular chest, my nails digging into his skin. He presses his hip against my body pinning me in place, his leg in-between mine. “I want you Lucas. Take me, all of me.” I say against his lips.

  His response is immediate. He carefully removes my dress, pulling it over my breasts down to my feet, I step out of it. With just my lacy panties on, he carries me to his room. He gently sets me down on his bed. He opens his drawer, beside his bed and grabs a condom. He walks back over to me and hovers, feverishly exploring my body. Suddenly I feel shy.

  “It’s like de ja vu.” He recalls the last time we were in this position. I smile as I remember that night too. He affectionately tucks a stray piece of hair behind my ear, grinning. I melt at his touch. “Lucas?” I say his name softly. “Hmm?” He replies.

  “Why didn’t you ever go to prom? I mean the other years, aside from this one?” He looks away almost embarrassed.

  “Because you were always there with Brady. I always wanted to take you to prom and I couldn’t handle seeing you in someone else’s arms. So I made it an appoint to never go, unless we went together.” I frown, not knowing what to say to take the hurt away. But he saves me by kissing my neck and trailing feather light kisses down my stomach.

  He looks up, watching my reaction to his taunts. Clearly satisfied, he moves south a little. I stir a little and he moves his hands across my abdomen up to my chest. Moving up my body a little, his tongue glides over my skin. It’s all I can do to not scream in pure agony. He’s torturing me. Finally, he finds his way up to my lips. Our tongues meet again, rubbing against each other naturally. He stays a few inches from my body to keep from crushing me. We break apart and a grin spreads across his face. “Are you ready?” He asks, searching my face, eyes. I smile. “I’m ready, when you are.”

  Chapter 29

  I look at my packed bags and wonder if I could have done this if Lucas wasn’t going with me. Once things had gotten better for us, it was the perfect time to ask him to move to New York with me. He was all for it. I was afraid I’d have to beg him to agree, but once was all it took.

  “Thank God, because I couldn’t ever survive the big city without you.” I’d said that night. It was our graduation night, where we’d decided to inform our families that we were back together-for good this time.

  “I knew you couldn’t live without my sister.” Sarah had told him. We all laughed. It was times like these, where family was most important and I was blessed to finally have my family back.

  “Hey, we need to get going baby. You know how your dad and my parents hate being late.” I sit on my bed and stare at my suitcase, completely content. It’s a bittersweet moment, leaving everything and everyone behind for new possibilities, new beginnings. He sits next to me and puts his arms around my shoulders.

  “We’re going to visit as often as we can. I promise you. It will be like we still live here.” I give him a sidelong glance. “Really? That’s a bit of a drive or flight just to visit for a few hours. No, I’ll be fine. I just have to get used to the idea of being on my own. I can handle it.” I smile. He kisses my cheek.

  “That’s my girl.” Then he pulls me up and we walk to my new old car Betsy.

  It’s my eighteenth birthday today and we are celebrating, with our families and friends. Apparently, there’s some big surprise, but no one will tell me about it. I have so many ideas as to what it could be, but Lucas just shrugs, pretending not to hear me as he grins wide. Things have never been better for us.

  “Where are we going anyway?” I ask him as he gets in the driver’s side. He just smiles though. How can I get him to tell me? “Oh come on, you can at least tell me that.” I bat my eyes at him and give him the sexiest look I can muster. Instead, I end up bursting out
with laughter. I’m not good at batting my eye lids. He looks at me like I’m crazy, then joins me in cracking up.

  “Babe, must you always try that? You ought to know by now, that doesn’t work on me. It only makes you look like you’re on crack.”

  “Maybe I am. Now tell me where we’re going.” Then I think about it for a minute and lean close to him, hoping to distract him with trying to be seductive. “If you tell me, I’ll give you a surprise of my own.” He looks intrigued. But then he shakes his head. “Not a chance.” I slump back in my chair, thinking. I grab my phone out of my purse and text Brooke. “Where are we going?” I get a response pretty quick.

  “Nu uh, not happening suga.”

  “Ugh, this is so not fair.”

  He looks at me and sees my phone in my lap. “Yeah, I could have told you it wouldn’t work on her either. But I thought I would rather see your reaction when she turns you down.” I close my eyes and think happy thoughts. Hmm, I want a new house in the Suburbs but since we’re moving to New York and have a place already, that’s not it. Oh, happy thoughts. Horses. I like horses. I want to ride a horse. Lucas laughs beside me, amused by my attempt to think of something other than what’s going down tonight.

  “Give up yet?” He asks casually. I’d like to take his words and throw them at him. But I smile, through clenched teeth. “Oh I’m fine. I will just be patient.” He smiles and says “Good. You’ll see soon enough.” Then he takes my hand and squeezes and at that moment I feel like biting his fingers.

  He gets off the highway and turns on a dirt road. Only about ten miles down do we then turn on a street called Lincoln Drive and drive a few more miles, until a building comes into view. I look at it closely, as he pulls into the parking lot. It’s a big dark blue building with The Shack written on the front. Hmm, that’s original. “What is this place?” I ask, as Lucas gets out to open my door. It looks fancy, in its own way. Noticing my expression, which reads, “I’m not so sure about this” he takes my hand and leads me in the building. “Don’t worry. It’s not a-hole-in-the-wall kind of place.”